When I first wrote what I'm reblogging today, I was just not okay. Overwhelmed and not doing any of the work I was supposed to be doing. So The Queen and Tommy came to talk. I just let it roll, rather than trying to talk them into pretending we were talking Thursday night or Friday morning (which is what it should have been orginally).
---Come here, Joelle. Lay your head on my lap. You know it is not cheating, since you have put so much of your Master into my character and I am only fictional anyway. The Queen pats his lap. I look at The Queen's lap and then the whole of him as he makes the little brown couch look all that much smaller. Of course you are right. Should I bounce ahead in the Vala's Story serial, do some reading and just not share the details with Annikka, of later books that she's not close to reading yet? Although it might be fun to read some of Sklavimuth on the way there. I don't know. Reading "Week-long" the other day helped, but I'm just overwhelmed today. I'm not even writing what I should be, instead sitting here talking with you and Tommy. Tommy takes my hand and pulls me toward the couch. His gentle hands urge me onto the couch, pushing me half-way onto The Queen's lap before sitting on the other side of me. Maybe Placebo isn't the band you should be listening to? Well if not Placebo, who do recommend then, Tommy? I'm not sure if "angry" is necessarily better. So is Me'Shell NdegeOcello better? Tommy snorts. Maybe if you spend some time later with Mandisa, Jinny, and Chitra. Their story, I mean. Joelle, why are you writing this conversation rather than getting "Night" up? Or writing the piece for the Dungeon Crawl? Your plan this for Friday, right? [Dungeon Crawl is a now defunct blog hop I used to do.] I sigh at The Queen's hand moving slowly up and down my back. I hold the image of spooning with my Master in bed in my head and try to keep breathing. I just don't feel right today. It's not like I need to list what has me "overwhelmed"; you know it all. But I'm not working on the Dungeon Crawl piece- that's a "I'm relaxed and happy." How the fuck would I manage you and Vala rolling around on the sand, enjoying each other's company while I'm feeling like this. And I was already upset, swearing at the computer just doing promo... and so I'm supposed to add to my Master's feeling unwell by getting further angry because you know that dealing with e-retailers as a self-publishing author sucks? Bad plan, if you ask me. Tommy snorts again. You can stop snorting before I get Simon here to take care of you. I don't open my eyes to see Tommy's response to my threat, but I can feel his body's tension. I thought so. I sigh again. What of the Mandisa/Chitra stuff in my mind from what I'm doing on my blog. Any thoughts on my pondering? Well you are rightly keeping issues separate. Chitra's lack of experience differs from Vala's. Are you trying to decide if I would throw her in the deep end, so to speak, and be hands off, both sexually and BDSM, and let Mandisa do it? Yes, you were right in your earlier thoughts that it's "canon" that Mandisa controls Chitra's training, but that's not what we're talking about here- this is during the temporary collaring period. Along with your question, there's also the question of how Mandisa would be with Chitra. I've enjoyed showing Mandisa's growth, change in Vala's Story, but I know I'm writing prequel here. Does your question mean that I should be considering a menage scene? That could be one thing, although remember that Jinny is already beneath Mandisa at this point; a menage scene could be with the women, not include me. Tommy, why'd you even come along? Well you didn't respond to The Queen's "come here," so obviously you're out of sorts and need extra help. Tommy shrugs. And to be perfectly honest, I'm feeling greedy. I want to be close to my Queen today and He didn't say no. Simon's off making an aftercare tray, I think. I sigh, although this time it's more a sigh of longing than frustration. I wish my Master was up to doing anything that would require aftercare. But I do appreciate the wonderful scenes I got from you and he playing in the padded room. Especially the aftercare scene. I wish my gloves would arrive. Then I'd ride my bike to the store and ponder these things. I am glad you decided against the digital recorder; I think you will do much better with a notebook, pondering until you get to the store and then putting down notes. You know I will happily keep you company, when you have started biking for groceries regularly. Thanks. I tilt my head against The Queen's legs so I can look up at Tommy. Funny you're here now while I was thinking of you so while watching the Placebo videos. I may have listened to your suggestion to change the music I'm listening to, but I still have lines going through my head. Of course. You can't erase your drug abuse history; it happened, even if it's all in the past. And what of the moment in "Week-long" that you wrote with Eoin and I? I smile sadly. Do I make that mall trip that I mentioned to Annikka? Maybe look at pretty girls I'm too shy to even talk to then? And try to write the dungeon crawl piece, because at least I can write "The Queen and Vala fuck"? Tommy rolls his eyes at me. You're lucky your Master doesn't punish for attitude like that, like you've shown The Queen doing when it pleased him to. Have a massage chair. Have some frozen yogurt and then see about doing some writing that you should be. I close my eyes and breath in. I consider the tension in my body, how much there is in comparison to earlier. Sounds like an idea, if my Master doesn't say no.
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