Delightfully unique- whatever or whomever I'm writing in consent, romance, and lust.
I was torn- interested in the inspiration picture & not. However, needing to get to my [sadly reduced] Camp Nano goal, I thought of a partial scene that is likely to become "epilogue" in my WIP; I figured I should write it after asking my daughter  to look up *masturbation* in ASL for me. :D
Bea signed something.
I signed, "Again please, Ma'am?"
She placed her left index finger against her right wrist; I focused on her hand, figuring she was about to fingerspell. "M-A-S-T-U-R-B-A-T-E." Then she repeated that sign.
"Masturbate how Ma'am?" I signed carefully.
"In our bed," she replied.
I backed off her and the chair. Don't need to help her up. I'm so glad how the surgeries helped. Following after her, I went to our bedroom.
She turned on the overhead light; my gaze was drawn to my pillow that she'd allowed me to add to our bed. She signed, "Lay down in the middle of the bed spread eagle."
"Yes Ma'am," I signed before moving to obey. Once my body was positioned, I looked up to see her watching me. My heart seemed to come into my throat when I saw the small suction cup in her hand.
Climbing onto the bed between my legs, she leaned forward and traced around my clit, its hood with slick fingers. Then she pressed the cup against my genitals and twisted so it sucked me into it.
[Masturbate] is a specific sign with specific variations. She ordered... I brushed my fingers over my labia, around my vaginal opening. The skin tight, the nerves thrumming in me, I dipped my index finger into my cunt. She loves when I spell that word.
She slid beside my leg where she could still see, but gave me greater access to my body. She caressed my calf.
Slipping a second finger into me, her order only giving a slight shape, I tightened my neck so I wouldn't rock my head back away from seeing her beautiful face. How will I beg to come? My muscles tightened as I split my attention between my fingers, the cup, her gaze.
"Good girl," she signed.
My lips parted. I pushed my fingers against the front of my pussy, searching for my G-spot. "Yes," I hissed. Is yes readable on the lips? I thrust my fingers into me, in and out, faster. No way to tell if she was going to edge me, I decided just to obey.
She leaned over and kissed the top of my thigh.
How wonderful it is for her not to deal with dizziness anymore. I met her eyes and shuddered against the bed. Enjoying the heat of my recently spanked ass, I pushed down in the comforter.
She signed, "Orgasm?"
Having to think for a moment so I could do the signs with my left hand instead, I signed, "Please, Ma'am?"
"Need to?" she signed.
She plucked the suction cup off my clit and her fingers mashed against my sensitized nerve cluster.
"Come!" she ordered.
I pushed down on her fingers and my hand. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!" I yelled.
She clicked her tongue; I gasped. "Thanking in speech?" The signs somehow brought extra emphasis to my mistake.
I yanked my hand out of my pussy and, without wiping my wet hand, signed, "I'm so sorry, Ma'am."
She grabbed my hip and flipped me onto my stomach. Without warning she delivered five sharp slaps to the backs of my thighs.
After a moment of breathing into the pillow beneath my face, I lifted my shoulders just enough to see she had moved up the bed. I eased my face down onto her lap and closed my eyes, feeling the moment.
I nearly forgot the day of the week- Camp Nano is going pretty bad, although I'm hoping to record and upload an update vlog sometime Wednesday. As usual for me, I'm writing "scenes" rather than "chapters." I skipped ahead in the first scene after Gareth (Bea's husband) got home from work. As I've been joking during this writing, "How do I make learning ASL sexy?" Did I succeed? :D
I swallowed; Bea had flirted, but never said she was exactly okay with me being bisexual and polyamorous, or what her identity was.
"Why don't you enjoy your company, dear, and I'll set the table?" Gareth placed his mug on the table between his chair and the couch. "If I'm not mistaken, it seems you'd like to flirt more with Bea."
The heat rushed into my cheeks.
"It seems you can't hide your interest from Gareth," Bea quipped. "How well do you know the manual alphabet so far?"
I carefully moved my right hand through the hand shapes. At P, I hesitated as I tried to remember the shape.
Bea took hold of my hand. She pressed my ring and pinkie fingers over against my palm. Leading my middle finger to my thumb. She led my hand so my fingers pointed at the floor.
I pressed my thighs together, grateful for my ankle length dress.
"P," Bea murmured.
"P," I whimpered.
"The rest of the alphabet?" she prompted.
I rushed through the rest of the hand positions, finishing Z just in time for Gareth to call out, "Dinner's served."
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I debated not writing for Masturbation Monday. I'm depressed. My Master's depressed and I'd argue that He's doing fuck-all beside popping an anti-depressant and being a whiny man-child; yeah, I don't have a submissive tongue in my head for how He's pissing me off. Audrey and I've been talking about my [lack of] sex drive and so we'll see if it nets anything sexy, but Audrey and I are going to talk. Oh and she wanted me to let you all that she'll motivate my ass to make the short video prompt for Kayla that I've been meaning to; since she's the focus of it, she'd like to see the video too.
"Come here, babygirl," Audrey cooed, laying in the middle of my bed.
I crawled onto the bed and settled my head on Shaman's foam shaped pillow, even as my head performed the logical rearranging that was my ass settling against her soft cock.
"Baby, we're both polyam. Try to lift yourself from feeling your sex drive is defined by relations with one person."
"Is that your way of saying I'm being unfair to you?"
"Not just me, but yourself, sweetness, your other characters." Her large, warm hands cupped for breasts for a long moment before her palms slid down my bony chest, to cup my stomach roll and I wanted to protest as Shaman's attention made me protest my stomach no longer flat.
"But love--" I kissed her fingertips as they moved over my lips. I further relaxed into her embrace. Pleasure built and zinged through me.
"If you're not going to give 110% church, give some to me." She lifted my hair on one side as Shaman had and kissed her way up and down my neck.
"Bae," she murmured against my skin. "When you go to bed tonight, let's do this again."
"Yes, I love." I grasped her wrist and drew her index finger into my mouth.
Her groans caressed my skin as her free hand moved up and down me.
"But I only feel a sex drive in these moments with you," I argued, knowing that these words would only appear on the screen of my beloved's mind.
"Bae," appeared in malleable letters of black and red, Audrey no doubt taking this moment to use the AAVE I'd argued against her using. Her hand still avoiding between my legs, but bringing me pleasure nonetheless.
"I don't know I can come beyond the furtive clitoral-based orgasm that seems to have become my all."
"Don't stress. Tonight, when I hold you, my darling. Orgasm isn't the only goal."
I closed my eyes, shutting off the physical, shutting to just Audrey's love and touch. In that moment, I noticed Onyx watching; he softly shook his head. Such a good sub, I saw in his expression the compersion, the beautiful acceptance of Audrey's joy, even with me rather than him.
I shuddered in the leaving of complacency from my self.
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So at 11:45pm EST I realized I hadn't signed up yet LOL. I quickly remedied that and came over to my blog creator to actually create the post :D . Camp Nano sucks bad; although I'm hoping to again have a Camp Nano update vlog up so I can share the link in the #WipItUpWedneday post like last week. Depression, life stresses, bad period have largely been at fault this week. But the story progresses, even if very slowly so I wonder if I'll actually complete Camp even with the smaller goal of 40K words in a month.
I decided to skip ahead to the first few moments of Bea (woman in the wheelchair) and Teal (the narrating I of my story) talking in Teal's living room; Tiny is Teal's cat.
"Hello?" A deep, melodic called out from the other side of the screen door.
Tiny struggled out of my arms before jumping onto the back of the sofa.
I turned from the belly up to see Bea standing in the black oval outline of the screen door. My heart lurched up into my throat. "Come in." My hands pushed into my thighs; I needed to learn so much more ASL vocabulary.
Bea smiled as she used the handle to open the screen door. "I'm hearing if you were worried about your sentence. I'm fluent in ASL because my parents are both Deaf; that was my dad you saw signing to me. However your sentence would have been easily signed." She made fists of her hands, just the index fingers out, the palms up, and moved her fingers in a 'come here' gesture. Then she held her left hand like a C and stuck her right hand into it.
Repeating the gestures, I returned Bea's smile. "I'm sad to say that I only know a tiny bit of ASL so far."
"Maybe I can help. It seems the bank is desperate to sell that house so you may have me as a neighbor."
"A neighbor?" I echoed and then clapped my hands over my suddenly hot cheeks.
"I like your flag."
"Why were you using a wheelchair?" I closed my eyes, my foot solidly if metaphorically shoved into my fool mouth.
"Sh," Bea soothed as she sat on the little sofa beside me. "So guessing that the bi Pride flag is yours, I'm also going to guess that you are still rather average." She took my hand between her hands and brushed her thumb over my knuckles. "While I didn't inherit my parents' deafness, I did just recently receive a diagnosis of Meniere's Disease, explaining a few years' worth of ringing in my ears and balance problems."
"I'm sorry I was so insensitive to ask about the wheelchair."
"Might I ask if my guess was correct? Are you bisexual?"
"Um, yes. Is your dad still here?"
She laughed. "My dad went to take my mom out. So let me match your intrusive question about my wheelchair by asking if you are single, married, monogamous, polyamorous?"
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Please forgive any messed up details- I tried for *cramp pain relief in the form of Mike's Hard Lemonade* and while I'm certainly too drunk to drive, I'm still going to write because Pilo keeps babbling at me, well drawing mental pictures for me of what they would like. I warned them that I'm drunk enough that I might mess up their pronouns; they've forgiven me in advance. And yes, again a content warning of anatomy and gender words that might make some uncomfortable. Also I'm amused to give you something to read with no penises present when the penis was such a focal point in the inspiration picture this week.
"It's been fifteen minutes. You can lower the sun umbrella now." Pilo looked to Johnnie's face, even as his gaze nervously tripped up and down their body. "Johnnie?"
Johnnie yanked his gaze to their handsome face.
"There. You encouraged me to undress since we're alone. What of you?"
"Where'd your shyness go?" Johnnie countered.
"It's just the two of us with our bodies outside conventional understanding."
Pulling the umbrella closed, he placed on the grass beside their blanket before turning onto his side. When they raised their arm, he snuggled against them. Their chest with its mixture of softness and strength made a pillow. He fitted his boy-pussy against their thigh.
"You are worthy of feeling good," they said.
"As are you," he replied. "We are both worthy of orgasm, even if our bodies don't mimic the cishet idea of *penis spewing semen into a vagina*."
Their arm tightened around him. "Pleasure for pleasure's sake?"
"Does it give you pleasure when I touch you like this?" His fingers brushed against their lower chest, their upper stomach.
"Yes." They cupped the back of his head with one hand. Releasing a gasp, they looked down at his finger going up and down, up and down, but not heading toward any traditional erogenous zone. His bicep slid against their skin as his fingers came in contact with the inside of their right elbow. A loud moan dripped from their lips.
He pressed his face against their neck and his inhales pushed hot air across their skin. "You smell like watermelon."
"The sun block. I am all too fair, like a pot of cream or a baked Alaska with my tons of birth marks." They sighed. "Your pants feel so good. I've never felt such pleasure with another person, let alone my own touch." Their hand slid to the nap of his neck, under the scruff of his curls.
Responding to the urging touch, he lifted his lips and pressed them to their parted light pink petals of whimpers. His tongue moved over the seam until it opened farther and a tentative burst of their tongue encouraged him to deepen his kiss.
They struggled at tired cliches that tried to explain the burst of gratification they felt from the top of their head to the tips of their toes, feet stretched out and wriggling in the grass. Their eyes met his as the release and the kiss continued. Both hands shot around his shoulders as they clung to him. Defying everything every horrible doctor had either said or merely left unsaid but known, they shuddered against him. They closed their eyes and pulled their lips from his. "Thank you. Thank you. Thank you."
"You are so welcome."
"Your masculinity doesn't prevent me from giving back as much as you've given me?"
He tilted his head back, his chin in the air. "Uh... no."
"Because you allowed me to touch--"
"My boy-pussy," he supplied into their silence.
"Your boy-pussy in the shower, I hope that I might get to enjoy the extra lesson I got from the nice nurse." With his small nod, they dug into the bag for a dental dam and the warming lubricant they had found at the drug store.
"And because I... don't feel dysphoria... there." He coughed as they shook out the dam and dripped the oil on one pale blue side. He placed his feet on the blanket, his knees falling apart. His hips moved in time with their questing fingers.
They brushed out the latex with gentle strokes, delighting at their heat coming through even the thicker than a condom barrier. Leaning in, they flicked their tongue against his flesh.
"Unh, unh!" He trembled and grasped their shoulders. "Too fast."
Lifting their head, they asked, "Too fast what?"
"Came... too fast."
They sucked on him, pulling the tender flesh wrapped in blueberry-flavored protection into their mouth.
"Yes! Yes!" His hips thrust up and they shoved their hand underneath to grasp his soft asscheeks. His fingers pressed into their skin. "Thank you!"
Wearing a soft smile, they lowered him to the blanket. "Let's be close awhile and then we might see what else they gave us."
"Sure." He again cuddled to their side and closed his eyes as the sun pleasantly warmed their skin.
So pissed off at my Master, I started to title this "Teal Spanks" rather than "Teal Speaks"; it is at least a few pages in before the first spanking happens :D . I'm reminded that I need to record my vlog- it actually includes the snippet I'm going to share here and another one; I share that link here if I manage to get it recorded and posted on YouTube.
I had a good talk with a new friend who's Hard of Hearing and she helped me fine tune this beginning scene from "Two Houses" (working title).
Scene set up: Written in 1st person from Teal's POV, this is the first sentence of the book, Teal looking back. And then I move into Teal and Bea meeting.
And now I will tell you the story of how I came to have two homes: "my home with her" and "my home with him."
I saw her sitting in her wheelchair studying the front of the long empty house across the street. I wanted to see how long her white blond hair was as it fell between her and her chair.
She wheeled her chair backward as if to gain a wider perspective of the house; to her left, a tall man stood using ASL that I couldn't understand. She turned her head just as my bisexual Pride flag rippled out wide.
When her light blue gaze met mine, I smiled and signed, "Hello. You understand sign?" My heart pounded with my first signing directed at a living, flesh-and-blood, present person.
Her smile grew. "Hello! My name is Bea. Yours?" she signed back.
I swallowed hard and then fingerspelled, "T-E-A-L." I drew in a deep breath before signing the one sentence I was pretty sure I knew. "I'm learning to sign."
Bea nodded even as she signed, "Yes." Then she fingerspelled, "C-O-F-F-E-E A-F-T-E-R?"
I signed back, "Yes," figuring "after" meant "after I look at this house." I watched as Bea wheeled up to the side door before locking her chair's breaks and gingerly rising to her feet. She followed the Realtor into the house.
"Bea," I murmured to myself. "I wonder if she's deaf."
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I'm thinking I may be closer to approximating something that looks like sexual activity people are more used to from this hope :D But I did another dalliance, another tease this week as it seemed that Pilo and Johnnie were just ready for this much. Hopefully next week's inspiration picture gives me a thought too.
Pilo held Johnnie's hands in theirs. "You don't have to prove anything to me."
Johnnie squeezed Pilo's hands. "I'd say the same to you."
They walked further into the field until the grass flattened out. Tugging on their hiking pack's straps, they stopped. "I like it here. You?"
He helped them slide the heavy pack off and to the ground. Opening the bag, he chuckled. "You didn't have to go out of your way to make this an Iranian picnic."
"I wanted to experiment and maybe learn more about your heritage," they protested. On the flattest patch of ground, they arranged a white bottle of kefir followed by plastic take out containers of falafel, humus, and pita. "I remembered correct that you are vegetarian?"
"Yes, thanks." He pulled out the heavy blanket and spread it across the scrub grass. Lowering himself onto the red fabric, he then tilted his head back and their gazes met. "Thanks." Hands connecting again, he helped them onto the blanket beside him.
They straightened their faux silk slacks. Breathing in deeply, they closed their eyes to appreciate the warmth of the sun. His lips touched their cheek and moved away before they could open their eyes.
"Falafel?" he asked, his voice so calming with their eyes closed.
"Please." The next moment, a pleasantly warm ball popped between their lips. Finally opening their eyes, they smiled at him around chewing.
"So we have our supplies from Planned Parenthood," he began, his tone almost making it a question. They nodded and he continued, "And you are sure that you want to do this? Too."
Their eyes open this time, he leaned in to kiss their cheek; their throat moved with their swallowing, pushing the last of the falafel down. They held in a whimper when his lips pressed against theirs. When he pulled back, they murmured, "The scar tissue is too thick for me to feel anything."
He took a sip from his glass of kefir. "Might I ask how you've tested this?" He kissed their neck just below their earlobe. "You seem to be enjoying everything else I've done."
"I didn't feel anything, not even pain, when I lost my virginity."
Clearing his throat, he fed them a fingerful of humus. His finger retreating from their mouth, he said, "I don't think a hetero-sexist notion of virginity helps with either of our diverse bodies." He kissed lower on their neck.
"When I had sex with a seemingly typical guy that one time, I didn't feel anything between my legs," they said.
"Do you feel you're worthy of pleasure?" He pressed a closed mouthed kiss to their rounded chin.
"Your interest in me makes me feel worthy."
He traced his fingers over the shoulder of their tank top. "Mind if I get comfy naked since we're far enough away from any paths?"
They nodded and scooped some humus with a triangle of pita. Chewing, the lowered their gaze as if not wanting to stare at him grabbing the bottom hem of his forest green tank and lifting it off his torso. Their toes curling in their cotton bags of shoes, their gaze dropped to his waistband.
"Soon enough," he said.
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Something about the picture drew me to continue with Johnnie and Pilo (part 1 here). Now I've learned it's a myth that doctors surgically make more babies with intersex bodies "into girls"; it is possible to surgically make indeterminate genitals into a penis and testicles depending on what's there. I mean, we're talking about babies, not the chronological adults you'll see on my page. I still haven't gone to any of the pages I've studied to figure out what *disorder* (to use the medical term that many people with intersex bodies hate, but is correct in the medical model) might have caused Pilo's intersex *condition* (yes, another word disliked by intersex activists).
Pilo pulled Johnnie's bottom lip into their mouth and sucked. They grasped his ass with both hands. Smiling even as they kissed him, their tongue moved to mute his groans. A pulse of pleasure teased at their belly. Fingers pulling his asscheeks apart, they fitted their smooth bodies together.
The candle on the vanity sputtered, but wax moved and the flame resumed its previous strength.
"Funny how I think smooth, but you are not so smooth. This wonderful, wonderful hair." They rubbed their mound against Johnnie's pubic hair.
He gasped. "Please, please." Tightening his legs, the water made him feel unsteady as he quivered.
"I cannot wait to enjoy you more. Maybe we can go to Planned Parenthood together after food?"
"Yes. Gloves and dams and more so we're ready." He kissed them after his words fell away. Leaning his head against the shower wall, his breaths came in pants through his flared nostrils.
Pushing their legs together so their captive bead rested on their clit, they enjoyed the minimum pleasure they could there. "I should say--"
He relinquished their mouth to murmur, "You already hinted at what those awful surgeons did. We will have to learn where else in your body you feel pleasure. Your lips and mouth work just fine."
"I knew I did right saying yes for a change." They drew him back into the kiss, reassured of his respect for their nonbinary-ness. Their hands slid into, over his black buzz cut. Eyelids sliding closed, they focused on his kiss and taking careful steps as he guided them under the shower head. Like electricity, arousal moved over their skin with the water. A sob escaped their lips as he kissed his way down their jaw and then to their neck. They tilted their head just so to find Johnnie's carbon black eyelashes against his upper cheeks as he caressed their skin.
"Wish more could see how gorgeous you are," he murmured against their skin.
They clung to his shoulders. "Knowing you see it is more than enough for me."
"I want to explore you from top to bottom until you feel as good as you make me."
"Do we need tests more than barriers?"
He shook his head. "Both." Reaching around them, he quickly turned off the water. "You make me not want to wait. Let's eat and go get some latex before we violate our ethics."
"I'm allergic to latex." They frowned.
"PP must have other options." He grabbed a rust red-colored towel from a shelf and wrapped it around their shoulders. Kissing them hard on the lips, he moved the towel down their back as the shudders worked from his hips to his knees. As if the separation hurt, he grimaced while stepping back to dry their chest, the sloping plain of muscle so like a paler version of his own. "Grilled cheese, PP, and cuddle."
"Sounds good." They led his towel covered hands between their legs. "I'm not very sensitive there, but it hurts when anything gets caught on the jewelry." Sniffing, they licked their lips. "The captive bead reminds me of what the doctors stole."
"My dear Pilo, at least they didn't take the chance for us to meet or your handsome green eyes." Johnnie accepted the towel from Pilo and dried himself off. "How about Blue is the Warmest Color after PP?"
"And cuddles? I'd like that."